I followed this tip from Raise Your Kids without Raising Your Voice: I made a rule that fighting results in a time-out to the corner for the number of minutes of the age of my kids (they were 7 and 9 so I instituted an 8 minute time-out). I never asked WHY they were fighting. If they fought - whoever I saw hitting - got sent to the corner. AFTER the corner, we would discuss what the problem was and try to come up with solutions and alternatives. Using this strategy, my kids stopped beating each other up in just 4 days. It works!

Boys do fight. I have 3 of them and they fight but they also love each other. I think fighting is just part of their nature and mothers find it difficult to accept. I don't think you should intervene unless they are really hurting each other.

I agree that boys (and girls!) fight with each other, insult each other and treat each other badly even while they love each other but I disagree that parents shouldn't intervene. I think it's the parents' job to teach the kids right from wrong. If you stay out of it, that gives them permission to act on the animal level. I think you need to expect it, not worry about it but still intervene to teach them the more appropriate way of handling their frustrations and differences.

I definitely agree that parents should stop the abuse! Who wants to live with it? It's stressful for the whole family, parents included. Parents have a right to some peace and quiet in their homes - we're all stressed enough as it is. And also, it's easier than you think to get kids to stop being physical or mean with each other. So why not use some of those good techniques out there and do yourself and your boys a big favor?