How do you feel about your brother's wealth? Have you made peace with the fact that his house is bigger than yours and he has luxuries that you can't afford? If you haven't, it will be challenging for you to help your children come to terms with their situation. If you have, think about how you've accomplished this. Perhaps you are the kind of person who is happy with the blessings she has and doesn't begrudge other people what they have. If so, you can help your child acquire that attitude as well. Be sure to accept their feelings of frustration and jealousy BEFORE you try to teach them anything. When they complain, you can reflect their feelings back to them: "Yes I see you're upset that they have a cottage - you'd like one also - that's very natural and yes it IS frustrating that they get one while you don't." After this acknowledgment and acceptance of feelings, you can go on to share your values: "Everyone is given what he needs in this life - not necessarily what he wants. We have so many things that others don't have and they can be jealous of us. There are always people who have more than us and people who have less than us. It won't seem fair and at times it can hurt. Especially if people who have more than you are your very own cousins. But that is how this world works. The best way to be happy is to focus on what you DO have and never take those things for granted." Such a speech does not make unhappy feelings go away. Your kids have the right to feel disappointed. The information you give them gives them a perspective that - while it doesn't remove the painful situation - can help them cope with it.   Sarah Chana